7.30.2007

Self knowledge

So when I think to myself "self, do you think people are inherently good or inherently bad?" I tend to answer that I think people are inherently good and honest and striving for peace and harmony. However, when I am in a situation where I have to interact with a number of random people (such as this weekend, when I participated in an all-day focus group), I usually find that at least a few of those people, if not most of them, irk me. I find them annoying and ridiculous. Within a few hours, I find myself thinking that most people in the world are annoying and ridiculous. This is quite disturbing to me. I wonder if I am a closet misanthrope and can't even admit it to myself? Or maybe I'm just an introvert who is distressed having to be with a group of strangers for eight hours.

Since I got paid money for participating in the focus group, I am going to treat myself to a pregnancy massage on Wednesday evening. Unfortunately, instead of going to the Lake Austin Spa, where B sent me one lovely Valentine's Day a few years ago, I will be patronizing the much less tony, but also much less expensive massage place in the same shopping center as the Jamba Juice near my house. Initially I thought I would splurge and take myself to Lake Austin, but then I discovered that it costs four times as much for a massage that is 10 minutes shorter! I am cautiously hopeful that this Massage Harmony place will provide a relaxing experience despite the fact that they are the Supercuts of the massage industry. There will be a full report on Thursday morning.

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