Stages

I have discovered that there are three stages of a pregnancy wardrobe.

At first, you wear your normal clothes. Maybe you have to fasten your pants with a rubber band, and maybe you quit wearing some of your tighter things. You complain about getting fat, but you secretly enjoy it.

Then maternity clothes start to fit. You go out and buy all kinds of cute shirts and dresses and pants with built-in belly bands. You feel great and look great and perfect strangers will stop you in the grocery store to tell you how adorable you look.

And then there is the third stage. Everything is too small. Even maternity clothes start feeling tight. The 'adorable' maternity shirt turns out to be too short when your belly sticks out a foot past your waist. You are horrified to find that big, baggy t-shirts you used to throw on for early-morning Saturday trips to the grocery store are now uncomfortably tight around your middle. You start raiding your husband's closet for his biggest t-shirts. You no longer care about looking cute. Your only two clothing requirements are 'big' and 'cool'.

And I've got almost two months to go. I might have to start working from home just so I can live in my giant t-shirts and sweat shorts.