8.09.2006

Boot camp yoga

Yesterday, I had a brilliant thought: "hey, I've been doing yoga for four whole weeks now. I should try an intermediate hatha flow class!"

While doing my down dog, the instructor 'adjusted' my hips up about six inches. I tried to explain nicely to her that my body did not go that direction, but all that came out was a little squeak.

Later, while I was in a pathetic imitation of a reverse half-moon, she came over and observed my wildly shaking leg and commented that I was not breathing correctly. Honestly, I thought I was doing good to be breathing at all.
Finally, it was time to do shoulder stands. I was relieved, because I'm good at that one. But to make sure my elbows didn't splay out to the side, she tied them together. Yes, you heard that right. I was tied upside down during my yoga class. For like ten minutes. I swear.
When it was time to go, I namaste'd her like I was supposed to.


But the divine in me was not bowing to the divine in her. The divine in me was whimpering on the floor in fetal position.

All last night, I felt like a doll who had all of it's joints pulled out of their sockets and were dangling by strings. I felt like I had to be careful when I walked, lest my leg accidentally spin around 360 degrees. Today, to use the proper yoga words, I am very aware of my muscles.

3 comments:

Kales said...

But the divine in my was not bowing to the divine in her. The divine in me was whimpering on the floor in fetal position.

Teehee that is hilarious, you have just awakened the unco-ness in myself :P

I'm hoping to give yoga a whirl, but I'm afraid that my coordination skills are non-existant... I just know it will end in disaster...

Steph said...

The yoga I took before that class was not like that. I think that teacher is a masochist masquerading as a yoga teacher in order to pull in innocent victims.

But yoga with a good teacher has made my life much better.

Kales said...

I've bitten the bullet! First yoga class on Monday night, wooopie!! I don't know why I am so excited :P You will have to stay tuned to my blog as the events unfold... www.misssparkles001.blogspot.com :)